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December 6, 2012

Best Advice For A New Mom

My editor here at MSN.ca went on maternity leave this week and I wanted to leave her with a post full of wisdom and mirth to light her path to new motherhood. But life got in the way, which is definitely the first lesson of motherhood -- your agenda is no longer yours alone.

I was trying to think of what sage advice I would give someone who was moments away from having their first baby. And all I could come up with are the usual bromides that get doled out at baby showers and by experts on morning TV. So I compiled a list of my faves, ignoring or forgetting all the ones I don't agree with. These are cliches, but try as I might I couldn't come up with much more that was wiser.

Remember:


  • To trust your instincts.
  • Everything is a stage.
  • Don't wish it away.
  • The days are long, but the years are short.
  • The hard days make the good days worthwhile.
  • No one goes to college in diapers or without a full night's sleep.
  • It takes a village.
  • You are the right mother for your baby.
  • You can never give a baby too much love.
  • You always have tomorrow to make it right.

The only things I would add are: find some other parents of newborns to hang out with; don't worry too much about any one thing; and most importantly, remember the big picture. Everyone you talk to (including me) will have opinions on all sorts of things but only you know you, your partner and your baby. It doesn't matter if you birth naturally or with every medical intervention; it doesn't matter if you breast or bottle feed; it doesn't matter if you co-sleep or use a crib; stroller or baby wrap; use special washing detergent or regular drugstore brand; have a nanny or daycare; do programs from 6 months on or stay holed up at home -- what matters is in the end the is that your baby gets as much love as is humanly possible. Luckily, love is the easiest part.

Do you have anything to add? 

Want more chaos? Last year, I asked if you dictated what gifts your kids get.

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Emma WavermanEmma Waverman

Emma Waverman writes five days a week about the chaos of modern family life here at MSN.ca. She is the co-author of the family cookbook Whining and Dining: Mealtime Survival for Picky Eaters and Families Who Love Them and is hoping to one day to finish her certification as a parenting coach. She lives with her three kids, ranging from tween to grade schooler, and husband in Toronto. Emma has written for a variety of national parenting and lifestyle magazines and papers. When she’s is not making typos, telling you what she thinks, and thinking about dinner - you can find her on Twitter at @emmawaverman. You can contact Emma at embracingchaos@hotmail.ca

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