When Did You Know That You Were a Mom?
Despite what the movies tell you, sometimes feeling like a mom doesn't come with the pink lines on the stick or the moment the baby is handed to you.
Sometimes it takes a little longer to understand that this parenthood thing is permanent and so real that you can almost see the line going from your heart to their little body. For every person that moment when the realization hits home is different.
What was that moment for you?
For me, there were two moments that stand out in my mind. First, when I was 28 weeks pregnant lying in the hospital bed with doctors whispering the words: emergencies, delivery, bleeding. At that moment I knew that I would do anything I could to save my baby and stay pregnant for as long as I could. I also knew that I would love him no matter what the outcome. The resulting eight weeks of bedrest were the beginning of my active parenting.
The second time was when I was lying on the couch feeding my week-old son and he looked at me straight in the eye as if to say: this is it, we are in it together. Intertwined with that moment is the lyrics to the Natalie Merchant song, San Andreas Fault, which was playing in the background, she didn't mean for it to be about my son but it described the moment perfectly:
You'll be the brightest light
The world has ever seen
The dizzy height of a jet-set life
You could never dream
Your pale blue eyes
Lips so sweet
Skin so fair
Your future bright
It's rags to riches
San Andreas Fault
Moved its fingers
Through the ground
Such an awful sound
Can you feel me tearing up?
What is the moment you knew that you were a parent?
Want more chaos? Last year I wrote about the impossible task of not yelling at my kids.