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December 23, 2010

Winter Is the Silly Season

People do a lot of stupid things in winter. The cold and the never-ending blanket of white makes kids (and some adults) go a little crazy.

A couple of years ago my eldest son came home from school telling me a story about his friend's tongue that kept bleeding and how hilarious and gross it was. Finally, I got the story out of him of what happened to the top layer of his tongue. You guessed it already didn't you? 

He stuck it to a pole in the schoolyard. He wasn't dared like Ralphie's friend in A Christmas Story, he was just curious. And when he became attached to the metal pole he had a friend rip him off of it -- and so went the skin on his tongue, and my ability to look at him without laughing. (After reading this my editor admitted that she got her tongue stuck to the car door handle -- so it's not just a stupid boy trick.)

IStock xmas sweaterMy sons have also spent time trying to write their names with pee in the snow. That is, until their penises got too cold for good penmanship. And it got a bit confusing when they threw some hot maple syrup on the snow as to which yellow snow was edible.

Adults are not immune -- we spend hours wasting our time watching reruns of lame Christmas specials from our childhood. Check out this cool site: http://betamaxmas.com/ where they make it easy and nostalgic.

And lastly, the Christmas sweater. Remember when they were worn with irony? Maybe you still wear yours for sentimental reasons, or maybe you are surfing an ugly Christmas sweater website and are going to a party. Whatever your reason: I don't get it.

What silly things have you done in winter?

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Want more? Last year I answered the question as to whether you should force your kids to share toys, especially new ones. It is definitely worth a read before the fights begin the day (the hour?) after present opening.

Photo credit: iStock

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Emma WavermanEmma Waverman

Emma Waverman writes five days a week about the chaos of modern family life here at MSN.ca. She is the co-author of the family cookbook Whining and Dining: Mealtime Survival for Picky Eaters and Families Who Love Them and is hoping to one day to finish her certification as a parenting coach. She lives with her three kids, ranging from tween to grade schooler, and husband in Toronto. Emma has written for a variety of national parenting and lifestyle magazines and papers. When she’s is not making typos, telling you what she thinks, and thinking about dinner - you can find her on Twitter at @emmawaverman. You can contact Emma at embracingchaos@hotmail.ca

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