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August 19, 2010

Have You Called Your Ladies Lately?

I’ve been thinking a lot about girlfriends for the last week: the need for them and how the cast of characters change as you and your kids get older.

Mommy friends are a key part of being a successful parent. If I hadn’t had someone to call and bore daily with the minute-to-minute account of my child’s sleep patterns or even poo routine I might have stewed in my own neurosis.

As my kids get older, I meet and connect with new people; some of them are parents of my kids’ friends and others are people I chat with on the ball hockey scene or the playground. The magic of finding someone new is as exciting now as it was when I was 8, but it doesn’t happen that often.

So imagine my surprise to be surrounded by like-minded women at the BlogHer conference in New York. These were women writers who were smart, funny and opinionated. And everyone I met swore they were nerds as kids. They were my people! I was thrilled to connect and exchange ideas with them and days later I feel like I am going through estrogen withdrawal.

But wait! Before I run off into the sunset with all my Bloggy friends...

I need to stop and take a moment and think about all those amazing women I met along the way who I haven’t seen enough of. The Can Phone Anytime Friend because she is a night owl. The Always Worth A Good Laugh Friend, and the Friend Who Doesn’t Have Kids so we talk about other stuff and even the Friend Who Complains All The Time because it makes me feel a bit superior. I can’t forget the Always Full of Advice Friend, her words often hit the mark (though I can’t tell you what she said about how to keep your husband happy). I love those women and I never see them.

I know it’s not just me because I was talking to my So Close I Wrote a Book With Her Friend and we were commiserating about how we never see anyone outside of our respective tiny circles. When we try to set something up, no one can find a date and then someone suggests a shared online calendar so we try that but then only half the people respond and that calendar just sits there half filled out. And then we stay home.

There are women from my past who know me for who I was; they revel in my accomplishments because they have been there for the process. I shouldn’t take them for granted.

So I challenge you to call or email an old friend today. The one that you love and haven’t seen, the one that is making you smile right now just because you are thinking about them.

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Emma WavermanEmma Waverman

Emma Waverman writes five days a week about the chaos of modern family life here at MSN.ca. She is the co-author of the family cookbook Whining and Dining: Mealtime Survival for Picky Eaters and Families Who Love Them and is hoping to one day to finish her certification as a parenting coach. She lives with her three kids, ranging from tween to grade schooler, and husband in Toronto. Emma has written for a variety of national parenting and lifestyle magazines and papers. When she’s is not making typos, telling you what she thinks, and thinking about dinner - you can find her on Twitter at @emmawaverman. You can contact Emma at embracingchaos@hotmail.ca

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